"Smadar has such a deep understanding and way of working with complex and formative trauma. We’re not always directly talking about healing from trauma in sessions, but somehow we are always working on the trauma." -Client
You don't have to be blindsided by trauma triggers
Is complex trauma getting in the way of living the life you want? Do trauma triggers knock you off track? Are you tired of spiraling into anxiety, shame, and self-loathing for no apparent reason? You want your life and relationships to work but you don't know how to manage these intense episodes that seem to come out of nowhere.
You’re not alone. Dealing with trauma triggers can leave us worried, scared, depressed, anxious, sad, stressed, confused, isolated, angry, overwhelmed... the whole gamut. You don't need to suffer like this!
I'm an experienced and empathic therapist who helps people and with Relational and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), Dissociative Disorders, and Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) find their way to living their best lives.
Your life experience will guide us as we work together to find your unique path to loving your life. Our focus will be on what works for you now.
You can create a sense of calm, inner peace, and self-confidence in your life, regardless of your challenges.
You’re not alone. Dealing with trauma triggers can leave us worried, scared, depressed, anxious, sad, stressed, confused, isolated, angry, overwhelmed... the whole gamut. You don't need to suffer like this!
I'm an experienced and empathic therapist who helps people and with Relational and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), Dissociative Disorders, and Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) find their way to living their best lives.
Your life experience will guide us as we work together to find your unique path to loving your life. Our focus will be on what works for you now.
You can create a sense of calm, inner peace, and self-confidence in your life, regardless of your challenges.
What is Complex Trauma?
Living through traumatic experiences, especially prolonged traumatic experiences inflicted by people who you trust and care for, impacts your mind, body, and emotions and can seem impossible to heal.
You may be constantly and unpredictably triggered by things that happened to you in the past. You may feel out of control, spiraling into intense feelings of shame, anxiety, anger, depression, fear, and self-blame. You may have periods of losing attention and concentration, or feel like you're observing your own life (dissociation). You may even turn to substance abuse, cutting, and other harmful or impulsive behaviors to cope.
Growing up in a chaotic home environment due to caregivers' mental illness or substance use, or suffering physical, sexual, or emotional abuse as a child or adult can profoundly affect your sense of self. You may not even realize how profoundly these experiences affect you.
You may be constantly and unpredictably triggered by things that happened to you in the past. You may feel out of control, spiraling into intense feelings of shame, anxiety, anger, depression, fear, and self-blame. You may have periods of losing attention and concentration, or feel like you're observing your own life (dissociation). You may even turn to substance abuse, cutting, and other harmful or impulsive behaviors to cope.
Growing up in a chaotic home environment due to caregivers' mental illness or substance use, or suffering physical, sexual, or emotional abuse as a child or adult can profoundly affect your sense of self. You may not even realize how profoundly these experiences affect you.
Complex trauma affects your sense of self & how you relate to others
Problems from Complex Trauma often show up in the following ways:
- Emotion regulation difficulties such as too much or too little emotion, limited awareness of feelings, difficulty with self-soothing
- Chronic feelings of fear, anger, shame, sadness, helplessness, hopelessness
- Impulsive or self-destructive behaviors related to difficulties managing emotions (addictions, self-harm, disordered eating)
- Being in a persistent state of arousal; startling easily/being jumpy
- Sense of self as bad, inadequate, worthless, weak, powerless, undeserving
- Self-critical and self-blaming; hypersensitivity to criticism & rejection
- Identity problems such as not feeling whole, lacking a clear, stable sense of self, inner sense of confusion, frequent changes in career, life goals, etc.
- Alterations in memory and attention
- Problems with trust and intimacy in relationships
- Difficulty with boundaries, self-assertion, and setting limits in relationships
- Difficulty connecting with others; sense of isolation or alienation
- Frequent physical health problems such as chronic pain, irritable bowel syndrome, headaches, hypertension, sexual pain and dysfunction
- Hypersensitivity to stimuli such as physical contact, sounds
- Difficulty with sleep; falling asleep/staying asleep
How can therapy help?
Therapy can help you identify parts of your self and patterns of thinking, feeling, and acting that are actually survival responses to trauma triggers. These responses once served you, but now get in the way, and are often just as damaging as the initial event.
No recovery from trauma is possible without attending to issues of safety, self care, reparative connections to others, and a renewed faith in world. In contrast to years ago, trauma treatment today focuses survivors not on reliving the past or on catharsis, but on accessing the kinds of feelings you would have experienced if you had never been traumatized.
My job as your therapist is to hold the roadmap and guide you as you learn and practice these skills, not just to be a witness. Through repetition and reparative experiences you can rewire your brain leading to new ways of relating to yourself and others.
Together we can build and strengthen your sense of self-worth, self-acceptance, and ultimately self-love. This is not easy work. It takes a lifetime to overcome deeply ingrained patterns.
My job as your therapist is to hold the roadmap and guide you as you learn and practice these skills, not just to be a witness. Through repetition and reparative experiences you can rewire your brain leading to new ways of relating to yourself and others.
Together we can build and strengthen your sense of self-worth, self-acceptance, and ultimately self-love. This is not easy work. It takes a lifetime to overcome deeply ingrained patterns.
Our early relationships shape our identity & worldview
Our neurobiology is shaped by our earliest relationships. How our caregivers nurtured us shapes our identity and our worldview. If our caregivers were good enough we grow up feeling secure in who we are and generally trusting of others.
If we grow up with abusive, neglectful, dismissive, or invalidating caregivers, our brain got encoded with a distorted blueprint of what love truly is. Unfortunately, this becomes our template for all future relationships, leading us to compromise our needs or values just to be accepted and loved. Our limbic brain gets incorrectly wired and conflates abusive or manipulative behaviors with love.
If we grow up with abusive, neglectful, dismissive, or invalidating caregivers, our brain got encoded with a distorted blueprint of what love truly is. Unfortunately, this becomes our template for all future relationships, leading us to compromise our needs or values just to be accepted and loved. Our limbic brain gets incorrectly wired and conflates abusive or manipulative behaviors with love.
Survivors of childhood trauma generally have trouble negotiating adult relationships. You may either push people away by building defensive walls or become a magnet for abusive and predatory people. You may feel confused about whether someone really cares about you or not. Even when you see the red flags, you may still ignore the potential warning signs, not trusting your own intuition. If this sounds like you, you are not crazy or self-destructive.
Together we can create adaptive self-care and coping skills to manage and heal deep trauma and attachment wounds so that you can feel safe, calm, and thrive in life.
Together we can create adaptive self-care and coping skills to manage and heal deep trauma and attachment wounds so that you can feel safe, calm, and thrive in life.
Work with a therapist who deeply understands CPTSD
My approach is informed by neuroscience, attachment research, and nearly two decades of providing psychotherapy to people who have survived complex trauma and transformed their lives. This background provides insight into not only why trauma has such a profound effect, but also how exactly to heal from a psychobiological, neurobiological, and psychodynamic framework.
I have advanced training and certification in treating Relational and Complex Trauma (Certified Complex Trauma Professional - CCTP-II) from the International Association of Trauma Professionals and have trained with experts in the treatment of complex trauma such as Bessel van der Kolk and Janina Fisher, as well as Daniel Siegel, the creator of Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB), a theory and working model of how we are shaped by the interplay of genes in the context of relationships.
I have advanced training and certification in treating Relational and Complex Trauma (Certified Complex Trauma Professional - CCTP-II) from the International Association of Trauma Professionals and have trained with experts in the treatment of complex trauma such as Bessel van der Kolk and Janina Fisher, as well as Daniel Siegel, the creator of Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB), a theory and working model of how we are shaped by the interplay of genes in the context of relationships.
You can build healthy connections and feel safe in relationships!
Together we'll restore your sense of safety, help you begin to feel more stable and secure, and build healthy relationships with the people that matter most to you.
My Therapeutic Approach
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As your therapist, I know that your relationships are deeply important to you. If your relationships are in trouble, other parts of your life suffer too. I'll help you quickly get to the heart of your challenges and figure out steps you can take right now to move toward where you want to be. I'll help you see and break out of harmful relationship patterns, recognize your inner strengths and wisdom, and empower you to trust yourself in your everyday life.
That's the first step. When you're ready, once you feel more safe and secure in your life and relationships, we can go deeper. We'll look into core negative thoughts and beliefs about your place in the world and what you deserve or don't deserve to have. We'll look at how your formative relationships affect who you are now and how you show up in your relationships. We'll heal and grieve what you've been through, as well as those experiences you should have had but missed out on because of chaotic beginnings. My life's work is to help adults heal their underlying trauma so they can be free to create the kinds of lives and relationships they want. My approach is to trust and empower you in our work, so that you can learn to trust and believe in yourself. I strive toward cultural sensitivity and invite feedback about your particular experience in the world, and with me as your therapist. For information about my education and training, go here. For my practice policies and frequently asked questions, go here. To send me a message, go here. |
Smadar Salzman, LMFT, (she/her) Relational & Complex Trauma Specialist
Diverse populations are always welcome in my practice, including all cultures, sexual orientations, genders, and relationship structures.
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